The Awkward Middle

“It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare. It is because we do not dare that things are difficult.” — Seneca

Dear Reader,

Most of us have a picture in our minds of what it will feel like when we finally decide to make a change.

We imagine stepping into something new with a sense of clarity and momentum. Ready. Capable. Moving forward with intention.

And then we build up the courage to actually try.

And it doesn’t feel like that at all.

It feels uncertain. Unpolished. Like you’re operating slightly outside of your own skin. The actions that should feel natural require conscious effort. The words that should flow need to be searched for. The version of yourself you imagined hasn’t quite arrived yet.

So you stop.

Not because you couldn’t do it. But because the gap between where you are and where you expected to be feels like confirmation that maybe this isn’t for you. That you’re not as capable as you thought. That the old way, uncomfortable as it was, at least felt familiar.

Here’s what no one tells you –  that gap you felt? That unsteadiness? That conscious effort where ease should have been? That is not failure. That is exactly what being in the middle of real change feels like.

The awkward phase isn’t a sign you’re doing it wrong. It’s a sign you’re doing it at all.

Every new version of yourself begins exactly there, unsteady, conscious, imperfect. The only people who move through it are the ones who stay long enough to find their footing. Who has someone in their corner who has seen the process before and knows that the discomfort is part of it, not a reason to walk away from it.

Most people quit in the middle. Not because they couldn’t do it. But because the middle is supposed to feel exactly like that and nobody told them.

Now you know.

My question for you this week:

Where is the discomfort of being a beginner keeping you from taking the next step?

Sit with that.

– Ken